Last night was bad. Really bad. We went to a friend's house for a little "party" (it wasn't really a party it was just a get together but I can't think of what else to call it). The only food they had there? Doritos, chips and salsa and cookies. How can you be rude and not eat anything? That's just horrible, right? Yeah.... so..... SBD was out the window last night but I fully plan on jumping back on the wagon. Tomorrow. It's MrG's birthday! We're going out to dinner! We're having cake! What's a girl supposed to do!? Maybe I'll kick it with Phase 1 for a week to make up for this weekend.
Can we talk about my favorite (relatively new) dress pants that I wore to church this morning. They're baggy. I look like droopy drawers. MrG told me my kids (my students) were going to think it was awesome because I'd be "sagging" like they always do. Not exactly the look I was going for. I'm sad that they're my favorite pants but glad at the same time because OMG THIS IS ACTUALLY WORKING!!!!!! I'm going to have to look for a tailor, fast.
So. We're already back into November due dates again. It hits me hard when they're close to the end of the year and my hope of having a 20(08... 09... 10...)baby are thrown out the window. In addition to that trying and doing a lot of proactive stuff - other than doing it like bunnies - makes the issues more heavy on my heart. Went to my board last night... BFP. Got on Facebook after church... BFP. I'm trying not to jump into the pool of "Woe is me" and remember that there's a reason for this. It's one that I don't understand and I'd love an explanation but I guess it's not time for me to have one yet.
Our pastor was out sick today and the pastor that was there before him covered the morning service. He talked about how we should put God before everything - family, friends, job, HEALTH. Health. I probably need to work on that. He also said that no matter what our circumstance is, there is a way that God can use you to minister to others through that. I contacted the head of woman's ministry around Mother's Day 2009 and she said that an IF support group was "at the top of a very short list of things for her to do this summer". Maybe she meant 2010 because I haven't seen anything in the bulletin or heard from her about it since. I think it's time for another email. I've been through a lot and I want to be able to help others in person. The internet is great but e-hugs only help so much.
Ok. I'm off to bake brownies for the birthday boy.
I promise not to eat any of those.
I can't make the same promise about the strawberry cake in the fridge.
Jillian's going to kick my rear but the weekend has been fun and worth it.
You Are Who God Says You Are
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